In many cultures, it’s traditional to hold a vigil in honor of someone who’s died. Sometimes it’s a religious service, but you can also hold a secular vigil. In this article, we’ll explore what a vigil is, different types of vigils, and the specifics of holding a vigil for a loved one.

A Complete Guide to Vigils for Death

A vigil is defined as a period of keeping awake to watch over someone close to death or already deceased. This tradition often takes place overnight, providing an opportunity for loved ones to honor the transition into death. 

There are two main types of vigils:

1. Vigil Before Death:  A vigil before death is a time to gather around a loved one or family member who is ill or close to death. It’s a time to sit quietly and show your support as they transition so they are not alone. You can say quiet prayers or just be present during this time.

2. Vigil for Death: This is held after someone has passed away. Typically, the body is present, and family and friends can share and connect over their love of the deceased.

This guide will focus on the vigil for death, a special time for family and friends to gather, remember, and share their love for the deceased and honor the transition into death. 

Understanding Vigils for Death

Vigils, also known as wakes, are a common practice in Catholic funeral traditions and customs. However, a vigil for death doesn’t have to be religious—it’s simply a way for loved ones to gather and bear witness to someone’s death. It can be a more formal event held in a place of worship or a funeral home, or it can be a more relaxed and intimate gathering at someone’s home. 

Typically, the vigil for death takes place in the first few days after someone dies. It usually lasts between a few hours and three days. During this period of remembrance, people can drop by and pay their respects.

 When to Have a Vigil for Death

A vigil for death often takes place one to three days after the death and before the funeral. Since there are arrangements to be made before the vigil and funeral, it can take place when it’s most convenient for those hosting it, as there is no set time for it to happen. For candlelight vigils, these can take place after the funeral or even on the anniversary of the death.

What Happens at a Vigil for Death?

A vigil is a quiet and solemn event to gather and mourn. What happens at a vigil for death can vary based on the preferences of the family and where it’s held. 

Holding a Vigil At-Home:

When holding a vigil in someone’s home, the attendees may sit together quietly, or they may share stories and memories of the person who’s died, with or without the body present. There can be songs and readings at a vigil, too. The room may be decorated with flowers and candles, and there may be pictures of the deceased on display. 

 A home vigil gives loved ones the chance to gather during a difficult time without the formality of a funeral service. People can talk, mourn, and share happy memories in a place they feel comfortable.

Holding a Vigil at a Place of Worship:

When holding a vigil at a place of worship, a priest typically shares prayers and religious readings in a more formal service. For example, at a Catholic vigil, it’s traditional to recite the rosary and read passages from the Bible. The altar area might also be decorated with candles and flowers.

Holding a Vigil for Death For a Loved One

If you’d like to hold a vigil for your loved one, you’ll need to do a few things:

Notify Attendees: Share the details of the vigil including time and location. This can be shared on social media, through emails and phone calls, or through your network of friends. You can also ask those at your place of worship to share the news.

Prepare the Body: If the body will be present, arrange for a casket or shroud and coordinate the preparation and transport of the body.

Gather Decorations: Collect any flowers, photos, candles, and other decorations you’d like to display and ask someone to set up beforehand so you don’t have to do this.

Plan the Ceremony: Organize any prayers, music, or readings you’d like to have at the vigil. Ask friends and family to read or sing these pieces, and let me know at what point during the vigil they’ll share.

Candlelight Vigil: If it’s a candlelight vigil, buy candles and holders or ask people to bring their own. Also, make sure you have a way to light the candles during the event and a plan to either collect them afterward or let the attendees take the candles home.

These tasks can feel overwhelming, especially when you’ve just lost someone you love. Don’t be afraid to reach out to friends and family for help. If you’re also hosting a funeral or memorial service, the funeral director or worship leader may be able to support you in planning the vigil as well.

What to Bring to a Vigil for Death

If you’re attending a vigil for death, you don’t normally need to bring anything. However, you may choose to take flowers or a gift for the family. You might also be invited to give donations for a chosen charity or cause. If you’re unsure, check with the people organizing the vigil.

What is a Vigil Service?

A vigil service is a specific type of Catholic prayer service led by a priest, typically held the evening before the funeral. This could take place at home or in a church.

Candlelight Vigil Services

Candlelight vigils are often held in response to tragedies, such as accidents or natural disasters. These public gatherings allow communities to come together to remember victims, even if attendees did not know them personally. During these events held at night, participants stand together quietly holding candles, with speeches or readings adding to the solemn atmosphere.

How Long Do Candlelight Vigils Last?

Candlelight vigils usually last 30-60 minutes, allowing for speeches, readings, music (if desired), and a moment of silence and remembrance.

Do You Bring Your Own Candle to a Vigil?

Whether you need to bring your own candle depends on the event’s organizers, so check the event details for guidance.